Not Worth It
by rororogers
Summary: What if Lou hadn't gone for the boys when Devlin's men were after Buck? Set during Daddy's Girl.


**Disclaimer: Don't own Young Riders nor any of the characters :(**

**A/N: Set during Daddy's Girl. Tissue Warning! Written for What Might Have Been challenge on Writer's Ranch**

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Lou was on her way back from a run, she was hot and tired and just ready to get back to the station. The sound of horses traveling her way fast had her squinting into the distance at the two approaching riders. She recognized Buck and that uppity Kathleen Devlin right away. She shook her head at the thought of Buck being with that woman, how he couldn't see that she was using him was beyond Lou. The closer they got to her the more she realized that something was going on, they weren't out for just a normal ride, they were running from someone.

"Buck where you going?" Lou yelled out as they came closer and Buck slowed his horse as he passed her, stopping him briefly to turn to look at Lou.

"Tell Teaspoon I'll be back in a week." Buck called before turning his horse and rushing away with Kathleen.

"Buck! Buck!" Lou called after him. "Damn it Buck, why can't you see that girl ain't no good." Lou muttered to herself.

Lou had a choice to make; she knew Buck was in trouble or going to be in trouble. Did she take the chance to go get the boys and hope they catch up to Buck in time or did she turn around and follow him herself? She knew that if Kathleen's father had sent his men after them, that just her and Buck wouldn't be much of a match for their numbers. But she also knew that if they caught up with Buck before she got help, that Buck would be hopelessly out numbered. So Lou made the decision to follow after Buck and hope she had made the right one.

She turned her horse around and rode after Buck; it wasn't long before she was passed by Devlin's men. Lou swallowed as she rode harder. She cursed the fact that her horse was tired from her run; she'd have been able to outrun them if that hadn't been the case. A few moments later and she passed the horse that Kathleen had been riding. Lou was panicking now; they had to be riding double. They'd never outrun that posse on one horse.

Lou knew Buck wasn't stupid. He'd know they'd never outrun them. She quickly thought of any place that Buck might take refuge, the outcropping of rocks popped into her head. He have cover but how long could he hold out with just his side arm. She doubted he had thought to bring extra lead; Buck very rarely used his gun. This meant he only had six shots; Lou used every curse she knew as she continued riding to save her friend.

As she neared the outcrop she heard the gunfire. Lou scrambled off her horse and to the top of the rocks. She needed the advantage. She prayed she hadn't made a mistake coming after Buck on her own but she didn't think they would have made it in time if she had gone for the boys. Lou reached the top just in time to see Rance with Kathleen by his side. Buck was being held between two men as Rance leveled his gun at Buck's chest. Lou fired hitting the dirt in front of Rance's feet.

"Let him go!" Lou shouted.

Buck's eyes widened at Lou's voice. His fear increased when he saw the evil grin on Rance's face. "You ain't too smart are you boy?"

Before Lou could respond the sound of a gunshot brought a shout from her mouth. Buck sagged between the two men, who dropped him to spin around to face Lou. She fired hitting Rance in the chest killing him. The other two fired on her. She felt a bullet tear into the flesh of her arm as she dropped to the ground taking cover. She poked her head up and fired, killing another. She fired again and killed the last.

Lou scrambled to her feet and down the rocks to Buck's side where Kathleen was kneeling. "I'm sorry Buck… you weren't supposed to get hurt. I just wanted my father to get rid of Rance." She whispered.

Lou knelt by her friend. She tore the kerchief from her neck and pressed it against the wound to his chest trying to stop the bleeding. "Hang on Buck; we're going to get you some help."

"No you ain't Lou and you know it. Tell Ike…" Buck said before he started coughing. Kathleen used her handkerchief to wipe the blood from his lip.

"Tell him he'll always be my brother." Buck whispered.

"I'll tell him Buck." Lou said, tears rolling down her face.

"Be happy Lou." Buck whispered on his last breath.

"Buck! NO!" Lou shouted grabbing Buck's vest and yanking him up, shaking him. "You can't die on me! Damn it Buck!"

Lou lowered his body back to the ground and placed her arms and head on his chest as she cried. She didn't care that Kathleen Devlin was right there watching the whole scene unfold. She had just lost one of the best friends she had ever had.

"I'm sorry. He wasn't supposed to get hurt. I just didn't want to marry Rance. I knew being with a breed would drive daddy crazy. I thought he'd send me back to Paris to get me away from here. I never thought Buck would be stupid enough to think I actually loved him. I didn't know he'd fight for me like that." Kathleen said.

Lou raised her head, her eyes flashing with anger. She pulled her gun and aimed it Kathleen. "This is your fault!" She shouted as she watched Kathleen get to her feet and back away.

Lou got to her own keeping her gun aimed at Kathleen. "You wouldn't kill me in cold blood would you?" Kathleen asked.

"You're not worth it." Lou said before looking down at Buck's lifeless body. "But he was." She whispered before firing.

Lou's gun dropped from her fingers and hit the ground at the same time as Kathleen's body. She knelt by Buck's side and held his hand waiting. She knew that the boys would come looking for her soon enough when she didn't make it back to the station on time. She wasn't going to leave Buck alone for a moment.

"She wasn't worth it Buck… I wish you could have seen that before it was too late." Lou whispered before she laid down next to Buck and passed out from her own loss of blood.

The next evening with her arm bandaged and in sling, Lou stood with her makeshift family as they said their last goodbyes to their fallen brother. Lou watched as Ike light the fire that would consume Buck's body with tears streaming down her face. Ike moved back to Lou's side and put his arm around her shoulders, his own shoulders shaking with his silent sobs.

"Not worth it." Lou thought again as she thought of the cause behind Buck being taken from them far too soon.

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**A/N: This story ripped my heart out, you have no idea how I cursed my muse for making me write this. Thank you to my lovely friends who preread and helped me to do what I needed to do for this story ... and for supplying me with lots of pics of cute baby animals and hot men to help me through my pain. Please don't come after me with a pitchfork I did that to myself!**


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